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Under plain cover It is amazing the things you can buy nowadays Secrecy pays Brown paper packets Postmarked Uttoxeter, Basingstoke, Folkestone or Leek They seem to speak To all the anxious postmen Wondering what's inside Our myriads of ghost-men With something strange to hide Under plain cover Things that you really don't want all your neighbours to know Like C P Snow Cornflake competitions Leaflets on slimming and how to develop your chest Prudence is best Bunny Club subscriptions Will never go astray If they bear descriptions Marked RSPCA I look at all the kinky people I look at all the kinky people Under plain cover Hiding the nature of things that are best left unearthed Ruff's guide to the turf How to go [?????] Things you apply to smooth over your knobbly knees Or how to train fleas They're best under plain cover Things meant only for you Things you would not show mother St John's Rag Day Review
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